Hidden Self
by Colleen17
Summary: Our two favourite Paramedics learn that past friendships aren't always what they seemed to be.


Hidden Self

The dark haired, slim youth rode his motorbike with ease, rounding up the cattle to be taken to market. His long hair blew in the breeze created by his riding. He manoeuvred his motorbike around troublesome cattle trying to escape back to their favourite spots, to graze. The rider was having none of that; he pushed the remaining stubborn cattle into the smaller pasture. A similar, but older figure closed the gate quickly. He had a satisfied smile on his face.

"Well done Johnny!" Roderick Gage yelled over the motor bike's engine. "That's all of them." He turned towards his pickup truck.

His son Johnny Gage followed him and patiently waited for his father to start up his truck and head for home. They made their way along the dusty dirt road to their house. Their home was nothing grand but it was comfortable and clean, in comparison to its surrounding parched grounds. The much needed rain had not come as forecast, so more cattle were needed to be sold to keep food on the table and to build up the winter funds.

Both men made their way inside the house; they automatically brushed themselves down and kicked off their shoes. A beautiful slender dark haired woman stepped into the front room to greet them. "Lunch is on the table. When you're ready." She smiled at her handsome men.

"Thanks mom, I'm hungry." Johnny announced; his mom smiled.

"You're always hungry son." His dad stated shaking his head. His son had turned into a bottomless pit over the summer.

Johnny pulled his long hair back and put it in a ponytail, after washing up, before sitting at the table. The food served was plain but filling. Fruit, sweets, and soft drink were non-existent in the house hold. Johnny didn't mind, as long as the family were together was all that mattered. He knew life off the reservation was better in material ways but that was not important to him.

"I need to go into town to borrow some books from the library." He informed his parents. "Billy is going with me, he needs some too."

"Don't hang around town too long, I need some help with the milking." His father reminded him.

"Sure dad. Mom do you need anything while I'm in town?" Johnny asked his mom as he ate a second helping of pie.

"I'll give you a list, just a few things we're running out of." His mom answered as she gathered up the dirty dishes.

Johnny was in his final year of high school. Once finished he intended to apply with the LA County Fire Academy. It had been his dream to become a fireman since he could remember. He had his parents blessing. Johnny was already a volunteer fireman with the local fire station. He loved beating down a fire, taking control of it, not allowing it to dictate terms. He was a natural according to the local seasoned fire fighters.

Johnny and his parents knew that in order to achieve his dream he would need to move away, thus together they chose the Los Angeles Fire Academy. Life was hard on the reservation, everyone struggled and no-one helped the failing Seminole nation. The trust lands were slowly becoming uninhabitable, but no-one outside the reservation seemed to notice. All that was ever reported on TV was negative material, such as, alcohol abuse and the subsequent break down of family units; no-one reported on the more important issues; the failing crops due to the harsh lands and weather, the proud people trying to hold onto their culture under extremely harsh and enforced conditions.

The visiting anthropologists' who were only allowed to observe, didn't see the love behind closed doors, nor did they want to. Johnny could never understand what was so interesting about watching a person round up cattle on his motorbike, but observe they did. They never reported the need to help these people survive the harsh conditions in order to remain as a productive community. The anthropologists' observed, drew their own uneducated cultural conclusions, received their government grants and wrote their books.

Once Johnny graduated, his parents were seriously thinking of moving off the reservation and starting over again in a city where Roderick Gage could hopefully find some work in construction. Many families had already reluctantly moved away; the choice was to stay and slowly starve or begin again and hope to find a community that would accept them. Big cities were ideal to settle in but work was harder to find. Their son's dream of becoming a fire fighter was their main objective and they were prepared to do all they could to help him achieve that goal.

Johnny and Billy walked into the library. They returned previously borrowed books and went in to find more. Both were in their final year of high school and both had ambitions. They ignored the scrunched up noses of some of the older clients within the library and continued to look for their books. Most of the townsfolk accepted the Indians from the reservation but some of the older ones still held old beliefs; that no Indian should be allowed off the reservation.

After finishing at the library, Johnny made his way to the local store to purchase the items on his mother's list. He was watched closely by the store owner, not trusted simply because he was from the reservation. He ignored the owner and chatted happily to the young girl behind the counter. She was in his class at school and like her peers accepted Johnny for who he was, not where he lived.

"So, have you finished your article for the school paper yet?" She asked.

"Just about, I need to take a few photos and then it will be finished." Johnny handed her the money. The store owner returned to his office, Johnny shook his head. "I'll see you Monday." He called to her as he left.

Billy was wiggling his eyebrows. "You should ask her out." He stated teasingly.

"Don't be silly, her dad's on the police force." He accepted the way things were; look but don't touch. Mixing intimately with peers off the reservation was simply taboo.

"Well I don't care about what other people think, I'm asking Bethany out." Billy said with purpose. He didn't care about the unwritten rules.

"You're crazy...you're just asking for trouble Billy." Johnny frowned at his best friend, whose stubborn streak reared its ugly head more often this past year. He couldn't understand why his friend didn't just concentrate on his last year of school. He knew there would be plenty of time for girls after graduation.

"My trouble to ask for." Billy retorted shrugging his shoulders. He loved Bethany and no one was going to stop them from getting together. They had met up secretly several times already.

At school it became obvious Billy and Bethany were a couple. Some of the teachers frowned on the coupling, as did some of their peers for not following the rules. Billy asked Johnny to cover for him a couple of times, while he and Bethany went off alone together. He was uncomfortable with the sneaking around but Billy was his best friend so he went along. There was only a few weeks left till they graduated so he tried to focus on that, not letting Billy's actions distract him from his goal.

Johnny was elbow deep in grease pulling apart his motorbike for the umpteenth time. He had parts carefully laid out and was busy cleaning them, when Billy stopped by one afternoon.

"Broken down again?"

"Yeah…. had to walk more than half way back." Johnny complained.

"Need a hand?" Billy asked his shadow stretching over Johnny.

"Nah I got it, besides it needed an overhaul...so..." Johnny half smiled and shrugged.

"Johnny I need to talk to you….it's important." Johnny couldn't help but notice the seriousness in Billy's voice. He looked nervous so Johnny stopped what he was doing and picked up a rag to wipe his hands. "It's about Bethany." Billy sheepishly said knowing Johnny didn't approve of the relationship.

"Billeeeee...you know how I feel. You should be concentrating on getting that scholarship. Why are you risking everything for a girl?" Johnny reproved.

"I love her Johnny and I want to spend the rest of my life with her." Billy slumped and sat down next to Johnny.

Johnny couldn't help but feel for his friend and the situation. "Does she feel the same way?"

"Yes. She wants to get married as soon as we finish school."

"You know her parents won't agree Billy, and what of you becoming an engineer and whatever Bethany wants to be?" Johnny asked his despondent friend.

"Don't you see, none of that matters…without Bethany…I can't imagine my life without her." Billy sighed. No one seemed to understand how he and Bethany felt. He thought his best friend would understand.

Johnny couldn't see this ending happily ever after. "Do your parents know?" He asked Billy.

Billy shook his head. "No but I'm going to tell them right after our final exams."

Johnny was relieved that Billy was at least going to finish high school. If things didn't work out he could still at least take up studies to become an engineer.

"Be careful Billy, I see how the teachers look at you guys. If word gets around town that someone from the reservation is going out with someone from town, things could get ugly." Johnny earnestly told Billy. "Teachers just think you're two love sick teenagers but if they get wind of it being serious." He shook his head, Billy frowned.

"I know, I know, we'll be careful." Billy got up and brushed down his jeans. "You think you'll be riding in tomorrow?" He pointed at all the parts spread out on the blanket.

"Yep. I'll get her going." Johnny said with confidence.

"See you tomorrow then. Hey remember there's a maths test day after tomorrow." Billy reminded Johnny. He smirked at his friend, knowing he reminded him of something he was probably already studying for.

"Already started studying." Johnny quickly replied, not noticing his friend's smirk. Billy smiled to himself knowingly. Johnny waved goodbye to his friend, not knowing that would be the last time he and Billy would share a friendly conversation together.

It was the evening before the maths test and Johnny was busy studying. There was a knock on the door. Elizabeth Gage answered the door and was confronted with two very worried parents." Ron, Jen come in," she motioned for them to enter.

"Sorry Elizabeth to intrude but we were wondering if we could have a word with John." They looked around the room for the youth.

"He's in his room studying, I'll get him." She went to Johnny's room and told him Billy's parents were here and wanted to speak to him.

Johnny closed his eyes and sighed. "Ok Mom I'll be right there."

Johnny entered the room feeling very guilty; he thought he knew what it was about and didn't know how to not betray his friend without lying. Billy's father stepped forward. His face was serious but deep in his eyes you could see fear. "John, do you know where Billy went this afternoon?"

Johnny frowned; it wasn't the question he was expecting. "No I don't. I thought he had gone to the library. We have a math test tomorrow." He looked at his mom and shrugged his shoulders.

"John, please answer this question honestly, it's very important. Is Billy seeing a girl named Bethany?"

Johnny looked at his mom guiltily, he couldn't lie' it wasn't in his nature, and Billy knew that. He'd understand. "Yes. Yes he is. I told him not to but...he loves her Mr Runningdeer."

Billy's mother gasped and Billy's father shook his head. Their worst fears were confirmed. "Did he speak to you about going off somewhere with Bethany?"

Johnny was shaking his head, "No. He has a test tomorrow he should be studying." Johnny didn't understand the line of questions. Surely Billy wouldn't run off before finishing school.

"Thanks for being honest John, Elizabeth when Rodney gets home would you let him know both Billy and Bethany are missing. Ask him to keep an eye out for them?" He turned to Johnny. "If you hear from Billy, tell him to come home John."

"I will, I'm sure he'll be home soon if not already." Johnny had a strange feeling. His stomach churned as he thought of Billy. In his heart he knew that his friend had gone and done something very foolish.

Johnny could have kicked himself; he was late for school because his bike broke down, again. Just as well his test was in the afternoon. He raced through the corridors of the school building to his first lesson. He came storming through the door to be faced with a frantic teacher who was being held at knife point.

Johnny's stomach flipped ashis friend Billy yelled, "Hold it right there!"

"What are you doing Billy?" Asked Johnny who looked around to see who else was in the room. All the students were sitting at the back of the classroom out of harm's way. He turned and faced his friend. "Please don't do this Billy. Put the knife down." Johnny pleaded.

Billy shook his head. "And have him get me expelled. No way. He's ruined everything and he told Bethany's father about us."

"Billy, this isn't the answer. What about Bethany?" Johnny tried to reason with his friend who was getting more agitated.

"She's safe. Now you….." He addressed the teacher. "Need to be taught a lesson…." He straightened up and brought the knife closer to the teacher's neck. His threatening manner caused a girl in the back of the room to cry out.

"Billy NO!...Think about what you're doing. You'll ruin your life." Johnny pleaded. He was slowly creeping forward, watching the knife and making eye contact with the teacher. The girl's crying was distracting Billy and causing him to become tenser.

"My life is with Bethany and no one is going to stop us. Now you are going..." Johnny jumped Billy, who had returned his attention to the teacher. He pulled Billy away from the teacher. He grabbed his arm that was holding the knife while the teacher fell away from the struggle. Billy pulled his arm free and as he did, the knife sliced along Johnny's arm. The sight of blood made Billy freeze. He looked around the room frantically and fled.

The teacher grabbed a cloth from his desk and started to apply pressure to Johnny's arm. "Someone run to the office and tell them what happened." He called out.

Johnny was beginning to shake, he was going into shock. "Grab my jacket from the back of my chair and put it over him." The teacher instructed a student standing next to him. All the students were looking on wide eyed.

A few minutes later, the headmaster came bursting into the room. He ushered all the students out. The police were next to arrive, followed closely by the ambulance.

In all the confusion and chaos the police thought it was Johnny who had tried to knife the teacher. They assumed the teacher had fought him off. Johnny was roughly put on the gurney and whisked away with a policeman escorting him. He was handcuffed to the gurney in the ambulance.

When Johnny arrived at the hospital, the staff looked at him with distaste. "I see we have another crazy Indian." The smug doctor announced as he looked at the large, deep cut on Johnny's arm. He wasn't careful with his stitching and only gave the bare minimum dosage of pain medication.

Johnny was put in a room outfitted for prisoners. He was shivering and sweating at the same time. He went to move his uninjured arm and found it had been restrained. "What's going to happen to me?" He whispered. Johnny's arm was burning and it was obvious he had a high fever. He was alone and scared.

Word quickly spread in the small community about the incident. Parents made their way to the school to collect their children. Roderick Gage searched for Johnny. He soon found his son's motorbike parked in the school grounds. He put it in the back of his truck and made his way to the office. He was stopped by police.

"I'm looking for my son." He told them as he tried to push past.

"What's his name?" One of the policemen asked.

"John Gage, he's in his final year." Roderick waited for the policeman to move so he could proceed to the office.

The policeman recognised the name. "He's at the hospital. He tried to kill a teacher." He stated with disgust.

"What! My son wouldn't do that." Stunned by the policeman's accusation Roderick ran to his truck and drove to the hospital. He questioned himself. "Did Johnny let his temper get the better of him?" Then he listened to his heart. "No he would never do something like that." He was worried and concerned. He realised the policeman had not told him why his son had been taken to the hospital.

In the meantime word had got through that Johnny was not the offender and was in fact a hero for saving the teacher's life. He was quickly being moved when Roderick Gage walked along searching the halls of the hospital. Johnny was ghostly white, he's eyes were squeezed tightly shut and his mouth was pursed into a grimace. He cried out when his bed, in their haste of moving him, hit a wall.

"What's going on?" Roderick yelled as he approached the small group of people. Johnny opened his eyes and searched for his father.

"Dad, please help me." He pleaded. Johnny was scared they were taking him to jail. He was still restrained to the bed and no one would tell him why they were moving him.

Roderick walked up to the side of his bed, he placed his hand on his son's shoulder. "It's alright son, I'm here and I'm not going to leave you." He brushed his son's hair off his face. Johnny relaxed knowing his father would take care of everything.

"Who are you?" The doctor snapped. He was annoyed that more of his precious time was being taken up by this Indian.

Roderick straightened up; he was at least six inches taller than the doctor. "I'm his father. Where are you taking him? He's a minor….you have treated him without my permission." Roderick's stern gaze made the doctor take a step back.

A policeman stepped forward and put his hand on Roderick's arm to gain his attention. "I'm sorry sir, there was some confusion. It's been sorted out and your son is being moved to a regular room."

"What do you mean regular room? Where was he before now?" Roderick demanded. He could feel his son's body stiffen under his hand.

"He was in the prison ward. In all the confusion we thought your son was the offender but it turned out that your son saved a teacher's life." He looked at his notebook "A Billy Runningdeer is the offender and he's still at large." He looked at Roderick as if all was well with the world, that the mistake did not matter. The policeman turned to leave.

"I think you owe my son an apology." Stated Roderick.

The policeman turned around and looked at Johnny then Roderick. "I didn't make the mistake, only corrected it. You'll have to take that up with my superiors." He blandly stated and left.

Roderick shook his head. "Let it go dad, that's what you'd say to me." His son looked up at his father with fever glazed eyes.

"It's harder when it's your own flesh and blood son." Roderick looked down at his son with pride. They continued to move him and Roderick followed closely not breaking contact with his son.

The doctor placed his hand on Roderick's chest to stop him from entering the room. "We need to settle him first." He firmly stated.

"You'll do it with me in the room." Roderick countered, he had no intension of leaving his son's side now that he had found him.

The doctor nodded and supervised Johnny being moved. He went to leave, "What are you doing about the fever and the pain?" asked Roderick.

The doctor turned and frowned. "Are you questioning my care of your son?"

"Yes!" Responded Roderick and he folded his arms in front of his chest.

"The fever is a reaction to the trauma and I'll get him some oral medication for the pain." The doctor stated uncaringly.

"Give me a prescription for the pain medication…I'm taking my son home. We'll look after him ourselves." A sigh of relief could be heard from the bed. The doctor left abruptly but couldn't help smiling to himself, he was glad to be rid of them.

Elizabeth was shocked when Roderick carried their son into the house. After checking him, she quickly started cooling her son down and applied an herbal paste to the wound. It was red and slightly swollen. She was horrified when Roderick told her what had happened in the classroom and the subsequent treatment of Johnny afterwards. Johnny's fever broke around dawn. He drifted off into a much needed deep healing sleep.

Elizabeth chose that time to go to bed, while Roderick sat with his son. He was proud of his son for helping the teacher. He was disappointed with Billy and wondered what had caused him to want to hurt a teacher. It wouldn't be till many years later that Johnny would hear the whole story from Billy.

Johnny was up and feeling much better the next afternoon. His arm looked good and was even starting to itch a little. He went back to school the following week after his stitches had been removed by his mother. They never returned to the hospital.

When Johnny arrived at school, it was all anyone could talk about. 'Billy and Bethany had run off.' Johnny tried to concentrate on his work and kept pretty much to himself. None of the teachers thanked him for his actions. However, his peers had a new respect for the youth.

Despite the struggles on the ranch, and the upset of Billy and Bethany's disappearance, Johnny graduated high school with honours and sent his application into the Fire Academy. He was a little saddened that his best friend was not there graduating with him.

A week after graduating Johnny received a letter informing him that he had been accepted into the LA Fire Academy. His acceptance into the Academy brought expenses that his family could ill afford. His father gladly sold his prize bull to pay for Johnny's move to LA and subsequent money to live on while attending the Academy. They were proud of their son and would have done anything to make sure he achieved his dream.

Johnny worked part time pumping gas in a nearby gas station whilst training at the academy. Although extremely tired, he flourished in the Academy, soaking up everything they taught him. His muscles hurt in places he never knew had muscles.

He graduated in the top five of his class. A slightly shy, hesitant skinny youth entered the Academy and six months later a lean, taller, more confident young man emerged.

No one in LA but Johnny, knew how his father could no longer survive on the dying trust lands; how his parents had to sell all their belongings and move to the nearest big city to look for work; how Johnny religiously, once employed full time as a fireman, sent a third of his pay to his parents; how later his vacations were secretly spent working in another state to help pay for medical bills for his father's cancer treatment.

At first, Johnny never let on where he grew up. If he had been totally honest with himself he would have admitted he was a little ashamed of his reservation upbringing. It took him a few months of working in the Fire Department before he was able to admit that he grew up on a reservation and his assumption that they wouldn't understand; that behind the poverty and the alcohol abuse reported on TV, were loving families who tried to hold onto traditional ways; was unfounded. Most of the older firemen tended to protect their naive younger fireman, once they realised that Johnny had lived a very sheltered life on the reservation.

Johnny kept details of growing up hidden, afraid of being stereotyped and all his hard work and achievements overlooked. He covered mistakes about simple everyday things that he had never experienced, with goofiness. He would change the subject with a blink of an eye when faced with a subject he knew nothing about. When he became a Paramedic and was stationed at station51 some of his hidden self was revealed out of frustration with a fellow fireman. He learned to cover his naivety by retorting with sayings such as, Go play on the freeway, Go polish the trash bins and simply shut up.

Johnny's carefree spirit from his youth would show through on occasions; climbing a tree on a rescue, always the first one up the tree; hiking with their equipment into remote areas, Johnny would take on the job with exuberance. Roy De Soto, his paramedic partner, would often shake his head at his partner. To him Johnny was like a big kid, he couldn't see the attraction of such jobs.

Johnny didn't realise that hiding his past and subsequently a lot of himself came at a cost; it never allowed his peers to see '_him'_ and being defensive about revealing himself meant no one could have a complete relationship with him, whether it be friendship or on a more intimate level. Thus, Johnny found himself never able to hold onto a girlfriend for more than a few dates.

When attending a fire, one of his hidden secrets came out and Johnny was not prepared for it. It was a single dwelling, fully engulfed. Johnny and Roy did a search and rescue for the owners. They were found in a bedroom, all three suffering from smoke inhalation.

Johnny went to put a mask on the adult male, he gasped. Roy looked over at his partner. "What's wrong?" He asked.

Johnny looked up and shook his head, "Nothin." He quickly put the mask on the man. It was his friend from back on the reservation, Billy. Roy looked over at his partner; he could see he was clearly shaken. Johnny tried to concentrate, but memories and questions were running through his mind. He looked over at the other two victims, and saw that the one of the victims was Bethany. They must of ran away to get married he thought. He then looked at the child, a little girl around two years old. Johnny shook his head and returned his attention to Billy who was starting to come round.

"Take it easy." Johnny held the mask on Billy's face. Billy opened his eyes and blinked. The voice was familiar. He blinked his eyes to clear his vision.

"Johnny, is that you?"

"Yeah Billy….it's me." Johnny answered without emotion.

"Bethany, Emily?" Billy tried to get up.

"They're ok, you need to lie still. Ok?" Johnny pushed Billy back down.

"Get onto Rampart Johnny." Roy called out.

"Yeah...right…." Johnny got up and grabbed the biophone. Roy could see his partner was distracted and wondered if he knew these people. He gave Dr Brackett the vitals and all three victims were transported to the hospital. Johnny accompanied them in the ambulance.

"So you became a fireman?" Billy looked at Johnny a little sadly. "You always said that's what you wanted to be."

"Yeah I became a fireman and now I'm a Paramedic."

"Wow." Billy closed his eyes. Johnny couldn't help but wonder if Billy had achieved his dreams. He thought not, by the condition of the house and the area it was in.

Nothing was said for the remainder of the trip. All three patients were whisked away. As Johnny exited the treatment room he felt completely drained, his emotions were in turmoil. Part of his hidden self was lying in treatment room 3. Roy walked up behind his partner; he was worried by the hunched posture.

"Johnny, you ok?" He put his hand on Johnny's shoulder.

"What, yeah I'm fine Roy." Johnny tried to smile but it didn't reach his eyes.

"Johnny, did you know those people?" he asked out of concern. His partner seemed a little upset.

"A long time ago Roy. Don't worry about it." Johnny waved off his partner's concern and walked towards the nurse's station. He picked up the coffee pot and offered Roy coffee.

Dixie joined them a few seconds later. Roy was about to question his partner more but Johnny turned his attention to the nurse. "Are they going to be ok?"

"They're going to be fine…..although Kel is a little worried about their wellbeing. He said all three were underweight." She looked puzzled.

Johnny turned and looked away, it was obvious things had not been easy for his friends. At least they were trying to make a go of it and they were together as a family he thought. He needed to do something for his friend; they had lost everything in the fire.

Roy didn't question his partner any more about the family. He could see that his partner was very upset and didn't want to intrude on the young man's thoughts.

When Johnny got back to the station, he made a few phone calls, and found somewhere for Billy and his family to stay. He called the hospital; they were keeping the family in overnight. Johnny asked Dixie to let Billy know he'd pick them up in the morning. Dixie never questioned Johnny as to why he was getting involved.

Cap said, "The fire was started by lamps. There was no electricity in the house. They must have been using candles and kerosene lamps." Roy looked towards his partner who was standing by the sink.

Johnny immediately thought how the struggles from the reservation had followed Billy to LA. That night, he washed and dried the evening dishes in silence. His crew mates sensed Johnny was troubled over the last run, so they left him alone.

Johnny was sitting in front of his locker polishing his boots. His thoughts were back on the reservation riding his motorbike, his long hair blowing around his shoulders, not a care in the world. He and Billy were sitting by the river, stretched out in the long cool grass, making plans for their future; Johnny becoming a fireman and Billy becoming an engineer.

Johnny sighed sadly. Billy's dreams had been shattered in a society that would not allow the couple to marry openly. Instead they had to run away and fend for themselves.

Roy watched his partner from the doorway, hesitant to interrupt. Johnny was very private about some things and Roy sensed this was one of them. He decided to leave Johnny to his own thoughts. He could see that his friend was troubled and clearly wanted to be left alone. Roy had gotten used to Johnny's habits over the couple of years they had been together as partners and knew when to leave well enough alone.

After a night of only a couple of minor runs Johnny made his way over to the hospital. He found Billy, Bethany and Emily in the ER waiting room signing papers. The two men looked at each other, and, for a moment they were two young boys living their carefree life back on the reservation. They shook hands, but the broken dreams had put an uneasy barrier between the once best friends. "You didn't need to come. We're fine Johnny. We don't need your help." Billy turned to gather up his family.

"Billy." Johnny placed his hand on his friend's arm.

Billy shrugged off his once best friend's hand. "I said we're fine Johnny. Leave us alone."

"I want to help, you're my friend. You've lost everything, so I've found a place for you and your family to stay. Please Billy, let me help you." Johnny pleaded.

"No! I don't need your help or your pity. We can look after ourselves." Billy shrugged Johnny off and walked away.

Johnny looked around and noticed several nurses and orderlies had witnessed the encounter. He sighed and slowly made his way back to his car. He wondered if Billy knew where his parents now lived, and if his parents knew they were grandparents. The scandal of the Indian from the reservation running off with the respected white girl, after threatening to kill a teacher, had driven Billy's parents away from the reservation. Johnny sadly pushed all his memories back deep inside him to remain hidden from the world. The Indian part of his heart cried for his friend. Billy had made choices, driven by love and hate; he could only hope they would find happiness and peace.

The next morning Johnny parked his car and made his way to his locker. He was early for shift and had not slept well. The dark circles under his eyes evidenced his lack of sleep. Dreams of Billy in the classroom with the knife and of the fire with his family had taunted him throughout the night.

"Dixie told me you had a bad scene with your friend yesterday." Roy stated as he cautiously approached Johnny in the locker room. He saw his partner's body stiffen; his silence told Roy that he wasn't ready to talk about it. Roy pushed on anyway, hoping to get his partner to open up. "She told me they refused your help." Roy sat on the bench waiting for Johnny to answer.

Johnny knew Roy only wanted to help, just as Johnny wanted to help Billy. That's what friends did, but this was something Roy could not help with. "It's none of your concern Roy. Leave it alone." Johnny shut his locker and walked out.

There it was Roy thought, the doors were shut and bolted. Roy had seen his partner do this many times. "What was that all about?" asked Chet.

Roy shook his head, "Leave it alone Chet. Johnny will talk when he's ready." Johnny was his best friend, but he couldn't help but feel it wasn't a complete friendship. Something was missing and it was the missing part of their friendship that kept it impersonal.

In the late afternoon the klaxons sounded and the station was called out to an MVA. It was some time before the squad backed into the bay area. The squad had been called out to two more runs after the MVA and when they finally got back to the station the engine crew were already in their bunks asleep. Johnny and Roy made their way to the showers. As usual Roy had first shower. Johnny always had second shower because he liked to take his time. The luxury of having long hot showers made him feel good. On the reservation because of the shortage of water and the cost of heating the water, showers were short and only warm, never hot.

"I'm going to sleep Johnny." Roy yelled out.

"Ok!" Johnny quietly finished his shower and got dressed. He made his way into the kitchen and poured himself a glass of milk. He could hear the hum of the cars on the freeway that ran behind the station. He thought how it was never completely quiet in the city; there was always noise from something whether it was traffic or people. He thought about Billy and his family; he wondered where they would be sleeping tonight, hopefully not on the streets. He felt a little guilty about his situation but shook those feelings away. Billy had a loving family and would somehow survive. He only wished they could have regained the trust and friendship they once had in their carefree youthful days so that Billy could accept his help.

Chet was on four weeks' vacation, a planned trip to Ireland with his mom. He'd been saving up for it for some time. Johnny drove them to the airport and wished them a safe trip. He envied Chet, who came from a large family. He always had a relative like a cousin who could help out with whatever was needed. His replacement was Frank Patterson who turned out to be an old school friend of Roys.

"I didn't even know you lived here in LA let alone being a fireman." exclaimed a rather surprised Roy.

"Yeah well I've only been living here for about two months. Eleana and I divorced and I wanted a fresh start so I moved to LA. It's so good to see a friendly face." He slapped Roy on the back, totally ignoring the rest of the crew in the locker room. Johnny watched his partner leave with his old friend.

At roll call Frank was introduced to the rest of the crew. He sat down in the kitchen around the table sipping coffee with them. He came across as a friendly person as he laughed and talked about some of his and Roy's exploits whilst kids, growing up in Sacramento. Roy reminisced along with him. The klaxons interrupted the reunion of two old friends and the squad was called out on a run.

On their way back to the station Johnny looked at his partner. "You don't mind Frank bringing up some of the things you got up to as a kid?" He asked tentatively.

Roy frowned, wondering why Johnny would ask such a question. "No... you know Frank and I were best friends in school. We used to be called the terrible two by some of our teachers." He smiled thinking about some of their escapades.

"So it doesn't embarrass you?" Johnny asked not quite sure he should know such personal info about his partner. Roy frowned.

"Johnny there's nothing wrong with talking about things you did as a kid. We all did them…you can't tell me you didn't do them yourself. What about with Billy from that family we rescued." Johnny cringed when Roy mentioned his childhood friend's name.

"Leave it Roy." Johnny shifted uncomfortably in his seat and turned and looked out the side window. Roy recognised his partner closing off to him.

"You know Johnny, it's ok to talk about growing up…no one will pass judgement on you. We all got up to mischief and it wasn't all wonderful. We all had our own problems growing up." Johnny continued to look out the window, Roy sighed.

Johnny sighed "You just wouldn't understand...with...the way it was for me."

"You mustn't think much of our friendship if you think I wouldn't understand Johnny." Roy was annoyed that his partner didn't trust their friendship enough to share his childhood memories.

Johnny looked out the window, he blinked as his eyes burned, but he remained silent. Roy shook his head. "Ok if that's the way you want it." Roy backed the squad into the station. "Just remember this Johnny…you can't go through life without a past it makes you shallow." Roy got out of the squad without waiting for Johnny to reply. Johnny listened to Roy walk away. Someone he had considered a best friend and who knew all his secrets didn't want to be friends with him so how could he expect Roy to be best friends with him.

The klaxons sounded _'Station51 possible heart attack 2432 Westview cross street Beumont Time out 11:32'_

They made their way to the home in question quickly. Captain Stanley banged on the door, there was no answer and it was locked. Marco and Frank checked windows. Marco yelled out that he could see someone lying on the floor. They broke the window and climbed in.

"He's in full arrest!" Johnny exclaimed. Moving with urgency the paramedics they straightened the man and opened his shirt.

Roy started CPR while Johnny did mouth to mouth. Marco set up the oxygen and took over from Johnny. Johnny placed the EKG pads on the man's chest and confirmed b-fib. Roy defibrillated twice but there was no conversion. He contacted Rampart while Johnny continued CPR.

"Rampart this is squad 51 how do you read?"

"Go ahead 51." acknowledged Dr Brackett.

"We have a male approximately 45, he was in full arrest, we have hit him twice but have no conversion."

"51 start an IV D5W TKO add 1amp bi carb, 100 mgs Lidocaine and send me a strip."

"10-4 Rampart 1 amp bi carb, 100 mgs Lidocaine and start an IV D5W TKO."

They hit the patient again. It was still a flat line.

"51 give 1 to 10,000 Epinephrine IV push, continue CPR." After a few seconds the flat line became slow bips.

"We have a pulse Rampart."

"Continue to monitor vitals and transport as soon as possible."

"10-4 Rampart."

Johnny helped lift the man onto the ambulance gurney. He accompanied the patient to the hospital. Roy cleaned up and put away the remaining gear.

"That was something Roy. You're the first Paramedic team I've worked with." Frank exclaimed.

"Thanks. Johnny and I started when the program first began." Roy told his friend.

"I might look into it. If your partner can certify I'm sure I can." claimed Frank.

Roy looked a little confused by that statement not understanding exactly what Frank meant. Sometimes people thought Johnny was a lot younger than he really was and with that, assumed he was inexperienced. He thought that may have been what Frank meant but he didn't have time to check, he was already way behind the ambulance, usually the squad followed it in. He got into the squad and left.

Johnny jumped out of the ambulance expecting Roy to be waiting there but the squad hadn't arrived. He continued CPR; the patient had flat lined and hadn't responded to the various medications ordered by Brackett. He was tiring but continued the CPR. Brackett tried several things but ended up calling it. Johnny hung his head. "Any relatives Johnny?" he asked.

"No Doc, he was alone in the house. We had to break in to get to him." Johnny told Brackett. He was exhausted, his arms were aching and his shirt saturated with perspiration clung to his slight body. He left the treatment room and found Roy standing at the nurse's desk sipping coffee.

"Where were you?" Johnny asked.

"What?" Roy didn't understand what Johnny was aking.

"I needed you to take over CPR, but you weren't there." Johnny told his partner.

"I was only a minute behind you…someone had to clean up the scene." Countered Roy clearly annoyed with his partner's questioning.

Johnny sighed, calming down and let it drop. He started to go through the drug box to replenish supplies. Dixie looked on and noticed a coolness between the partners but didn't comment.

"Johnny have you heard how your friend and his family are getting on?" Dixie asked hoping the change in subject would lessen the tenseness between the paramedics.

Johnny shook his head. Roy frowned. "Dix you're not supposed to ask, Johnny doesn't share stuff like that." Roy admonished.

It was Dixie's turn to frown. "Ok give. What's going on between you two?"

"That's just it Dix nothing. Johnny doesn't consider this friendship close enough to discuss personal stuff." Roy looked at his partner waiting for a response.

"We need some D5W Dix and syringes." Johnny requested ignoring the conversation.

"See, just work." Roy told the nurse, clearly annoyed with his young partner.

Dixie handed Johnny the supplies, he signed the forms. "Thanks Dix." Johnny picked up the supplies and made his way out to the squad. Roy shook his head resignedly.

Roy was the first really good friend Johnny had since Billy. He knew he would have to make a better effort to keep that friendship but again the old insecurities and shame surfaced. He knew Roy was making a point with him when they had been talking to Dixie, but Johnny didn't know how to unlock the doors to give Roy what was needed to continue a close friendship.

Back at the station Frank was bored with Mike and Marco. He loved stirring and making others he didn't consider worthy of his friendship uncomfortable. Power trips were his thing. It was the reason he divorced his wife; she didn't cower down to him like he wanted. He fell all over Roy and talked about picking up their old friendship by doing activities on their days off. He made a point of rolling his eyes when Johnny tried to join in on conversations, making it clear to Johnny that Frank didn't like him. He did it subtly ensuring only Johnny noticed.

Johnny would never say anything to Roy, simply because Frank was Roy's friend. It did however become awkward, so when Roy invited his friends for a BBQ, Johnny really didn't want to be spending time with Frank outside of work so he declined the invite. Roy was disappointed, his partner wasn't going, he worried that something was wrong.

Johnny avoided Frank as much as possible around the station but he did notice that Frank spent a lot of time sitting around. He never offered to help or volunteer for anything. It became obvious that Frank was not a team player and was very lazy and sloppy with his chores. However, he was a good linesman, not as good as Chet, but good none the less.

It wasn't long before Marco and Mike noticed that Frank only did the bare minimum when it came to clean-up duties. This was a messy and dirty job and unlike his fellow crewmen Frank always seemed to come out a lot cleaner. This didn't go unnoticed by Cap.

During a clean-up that Roy and Johnny were helping with, there had been no victims, Johnny found himself partnered with Frank. He noticed that Frank let him do all the heavy moving of debris while he stood back with a hose ready to douse anything that may be still smouldering. Johnny stood and said, "Frank I don't know how you were taught up state but here everyone helps with the clean-up."

"I am helping; I've got the hose ready." Frank scowled at the young paramedic.

"Well, you can put the hose down for now and help me turn over all this. That's the way we do it in LA." chided Johnny.

"You telling me how to do my job Gage?" Frank was angry that he was being told what to do by someone younger, and less experienced than him.

"No I'm just letting you know how we do things in LA." Johnny kept his voice calm. This infuriated Frank more.

"How long have you been a fireman?" Frank asked, expecting Johnny to say only a few years.

"Six years." Answered Johnny knowing it was longer than Frank after listening to his conversations with Roy. "That makes me the senior fireman so I'm not asking but telling you to put the hose down and help turn this over." Johnny turned his back on Frank and bent over to continue the clean-up; arguing was not getting the job done. Frank put down the hose and walked over and started turning over the debris but chose a section that was very easy and light. Johnny shook his head but at least he was finally helping.

Roy joined them a while later. "Taking your time here Johnny." Roy joked but Johnny didn't find it funny. He was really tired because he had been lifting a lot of heavy stuff without any help and Frank had been very slow in his part of the clean-up. Johnny frowned at Roy and said nothing. Frank immediately jumped in and helped Roy when needed; Johnny scoffed when he saw Frank helping Roy. When clean-up was finished he was beyond exhausted and Frank couldn't let the opportunity pass.

"Not used to the hard work of clean-up Gage?" He joked but with a twinge of malice.

Johnny ignored him. Roy saw the exchange and frowned. His partner had been annoyed with him earlier when he tried to joke, and now he was annoyed with Frank.

Johnny really needed a hot shower, his back and arms were aching so he asked Roy if he could go before him. When Frank heard Johnny asking Roy he butted in. "Ah ah ah, seniority, Roy gets first shower Gage." Roy smiled at Frank thinking it was all light hearted fun but Johnny was fuming inside.

"Well at least that means I shower before you." Johnny got up and left the locker room.

"Touchy isn't he?" replied Frank looking at Roy with a smile on his face.

Roy was frowning. "Yeah just a bit." He thought this wasn't like Johnny and wondered if he should let him go first after all, maybe he had hurt himself and wasn't letting on. It wouldn't be the first time. He decided to make sure he checked Johnny after his shower.

Johnny waited in the bay area for Frank to leave the locker room. He didn't want to be alone with him. When he still hadn't come out after some time he wondered into the kitchen and poured himself a cup of coffee. Cap noticed Johnny's slow movement, "You alright pal?" he asked out of concern.

"Yeah Cap, my muscles are a little tired from clean-up. I'm just waiting for Roy to finish showering." Johnny replied despondently.

"I'm finished…..Frank's showering said he couldn't find you." Roy made his way to the coffee.

"Great now there'll be no hot water when I shower." He rubbed his shoulders, frowning at the thought of a cold shower.

"Come on pal, I think you're being a bit harsh there. Frank won't take long. Why don't you go wait in the locker room." Cap waved for Johnny to go.

"Yes Cap." Johnny reluctantly obeyed.

He put down his cup and headed out. He was clearly unhappy; Frank had not tried very hard to find him. Mike had the same thoughts; he had been cleaning the engine and had seen Johnny sitting on the back of the squad waiting. Roy thought Johnny was being childish.

_"Station51 unknown type rescue 340 Alpern St cross street Masters Time out 20:46"_

"Station51 KMG365"

They made their way to the scene and found a rundown condemned house. Vince was waiting outside. "I got a call from a female that had been jogging by…she heard shouting coming from the house. It's all quiet now, but the house is really unstable. No one should be in there." The 'CONDEMMED' sign could be seen clearly over one of the front windows.

"What do you want to do Cap?" asked Roy.

"Let's just take it nice and slow." Cap cautiously approached the house with Vince, Johnny and Roy.

"Fire Department!" Cap called out and knocked on the door.

A voice yelled. "Don't come any closer!" Johnny immediately recognised the voice.

"Billy is that you?" Johnny called.

"Stay away Johnny. I don't want to hurt you again." Roy looked at his partner questionably.

"Billy…what about Bethany and Emily? Let them come out so we can look after them." Johnny tried to reason with Billy. His thoughts briefly went back to a high school classroom but he dismissed them concentrating on the current situation.

"They're fine John. I can look after my own family." Cried Billy. Johnny tried a different tact.

"How about you let me come in, and I'll check them out. There are a lot of nervous people out here Billy." Johnny waited for a reply.

"Ok but only you, I need to tell you something anyway." Roy was shaking his head.

"I don't like this Johnny." He told his partner.

"It's ok Roy, he won't hurt me." Johnny didn't sound very convincing. His voice shook.

Johnny picked up the drug box and biophone and entered the house. Everyone stepped back and waited. Vince hovered near the door and tried to listen to what was happening inside. His instincts told him to be ready to pounce.

Johnny entered the house slowly and deliberately. It smelt musty and damp. Sleeping bags were rolled out on the floor. Bethany and Emily lay motionless on them. Johnny looked at Billy. He was standing in the middle of the room with a gun. He turned his eyes to Bethany and Emily.

"Don't worry, they're asleep. I put something in their drinks."

"What did you put in their drinks Billy?" Johnny was worried; he could see from their breathing that they weren't just asleep, more like unconscious; they were barely breathing.

Billy smiled at Johnny, ignoring his question. "We have to stop meeting like this Johnny." Johnny wasn't amused. "Remember that teacher Johnny…you know why I wanted to stab him?"

Johnny was looking at Bethany and Emily. "I need to check them out Billy."

"I said they're asleep!" Shouted Billy. "You haven't answered my question Johnny."

"Because he spoke to Bethany's father." Johnny answered quickly. He needed to speed this up so he could help the mother and child.

"That wasn't the real reason. He found out I had been cheating on my exams. He was going to fail me."

Johnny looked at Billy confused "What...huh…What are you talking about?"

"And you know what...he was right...I was cheating. Damn snoop...he saw my cheat notes. So you see Johnny, he was going to take everything away from me." Billy stepped forward and pointed his arm towards Bethany. "You know what she did? She called her folks and asked them to come get her and Emily. Can you believe it, after everything we'd been through, she was going to leave me, said she had to think of Emily...said we weren't feeding her right...damn doctors." Billy walked over to a box and sat down. He looked up and for a brief moment Johnny saw his childhood best friend but Billy's expression turned sadness. "I would never have got that scholarship without cheating. I hated studying, it was easier to cheat."

"Billy, so you would have had to work while going to college. So what if it had taken a little longer, at least you would have achieved your goal….honestly."

"Huh! The oh so honest Johnny Gage. You had it made." Billy said sarcastically. Johnny didn't understand Billy's attitude, he came from a loving family like himself.

"No I didn't Billy." Johnny interrupted. "My father had to sell his prize bull to pay for me to move to LA. I worked every vacation for three years and worked nights pumping gas while attending the fire academy. So….don't tell me I had it easy, or my folks." Johnny stated in a challenging voice.

A resigned smile crept across Billy's face, Johnny yelled," Billy no!" A gunshot rang out, but the gun was old, it exploded as it went off.

Vince heard Johnny's shout and pushed on the door, it was locked. He stepped back and kicked it in just as the gun went off. When he entered, Johnny was trying to raise Billy's body off the box to check if he was still alive. Cap and Vince immediately helped Johnny. They laid him down and Roy checked for a pulse. "Start CPR Cap, Marco put oxygen on him."

Johnny went into Paramedic mode checking Bethany and Emily. They were barely alive. He recorded their vitals and contacted Rampart. Frank watched the whole scene offering no help to Johnny; everybody was so busy they didn't notice. Johnny was able to stabilize Bethany and Emily but Billy didn't respond. Roy accompanied Billy into Rampart while Johnny accompanied Bethany and Emily in a second ambulance.

Billy was pronounced dead shortly after arriving. Bethany and Emily were critical.

When the squad arrived back at the station, Cap called Johnny into his office. Roy made his way to the kitchen. Frank watched Roy and asked how things went at the hospital.

"Billy was pronounced dead." Roy said sadly, he couldn't believe it.

"Poor Johnny." Marco said forlornly.

"Yeah, he never said a word in the squad. Brackett wanted him to take the rest of shift off but Johnny said he'd be climbing the walls if he went home, he'd rather be working." Roy looked towards the Captain's office. Frank shook his head not really caring one way or the other about the situation.

Roy heard footsteps in the bay area. He went out and saw Johnny making his way into the locker room. He turned his head and saw Cap standing in the doorway watching his young Paramedic. "What's happened Cap?" Roy asked.

"Brackett called, the mother and daughter died." He sighed and hung his head.

"Johnny said he knew them from a long time ago. Dixie said Johnny tried to help them but they refused his help." Roy told his Captain.

"You better check on him Roy." Cap turned and re-entered his office.

Roy nodded and made his way to the locker room. Johnny was sitting in his locker with his head in his hands. Roy was determined, no more shutting me out Junior he thought. "Johnny?" Roy called his name quietly.

Johnny started, he had been lost in thought; back on the reservation going through the last conversation he had with Billy; all the lies and deceiving. Roy was a bit taken back by the lost look in Johnny's eyes. "I wanted to help them but he wouldn't let me. He killed his own family. I can't believe that was the same person I was friends with growing up."

Roy sat down beside his partner "Talk to me Johnny."

"I don't know where to start. Do you really want to hear about my life?" Johnny sighed and tried to get his thoughts together. "My life was very different to yours…..living on the reservation…..we didn't have a lot of the material things that we take for granted now…..We didn't have a TV…..We didn't even have a phone til I moved to LA." Johnny rubbed his hands over his face.

"What are you scared of Johnny?" Roy looked at his partner with concern.

Johnny sighed "That you won't like me anymore." Roy's heart broke when Johnny looked up at Roy. He looked so lost and young.

"You can't go through this alone Johnny...Please trust me...let me help you." Roy placed his hand on Johnny's shoulder.

"Not here Roy…..I don't want to talk here. Can I come over tomorrow and talk?" Johnny almost pleaded the request.

"Sure you can. You ok to finish shift?" Roy patted his partner's shoulder.

Johnny nodded. He got up and washed his face in the sink. "I'm going to have my shower and then I'm going to bed Roy."

"Ok Johnny. We'll talk tomorrow." Roy said adamantly.

Johnny wondered off slowly. He knew he couldn't go through this alone. He needed his friend. Keeping one's self hidden was no longer an option; his trust had been shattered with Billy's confession.

Johnny met with his partner early in the afternoon the next day. Roy remained silent and let Johnny take the lead. He could see how hard this was for his partner and wondered if he was the first person he spoke to about his past in detail.

Johnny started off by telling Roy about growing up on the reservation. Roy smiled; he could see his partner with long hair riding his motorbike. Johnny talked about his once best friend Billy, their plans for the future. Then he told Roy what Billy had confessed to him in the condemned house. Roy was saddened to hear how things fell apart in their final year of high school and how Billy had deceived everyone.

Johnny moved on and told Roy how his parents had to leave the reservation and how he had helped them with his pay and working vacations.

"I really loved it on the reservation but the land became too hard to ranch. Drought and the shortage of water ruined everything." Roy looked at his partner and finally understood the man sitting next to him; the goofiness to cover naivety, the constant dumping by girlfriends because Johnny was unable to show them his true self and the anger that would show through sometimes when Chet went too far.

"I don't know why you kept this hidden Johnny; it's a part of you." Roy pointed to Johnny's heart. "I think you've been carrying guilt around for a long time, feeling that you let Billy down. You didn't Johnny; Billy let himself down, by breaking the law and almost killing you. He could have hit an artery and you would have died on that classroom floor. I also think you're a little ashamed of your past but you shouldn't be." Johnny nodded, he knew Roy was right.

"Don't be so hard on yourself Junior. You have to open yourself up to people Johnny and let them get to know you. Don't be so afraid to let people see who you truly are." He put his arm around Johnny's shoulders, "You wouldn't be the caring person you are if you had grown up differently. You appreciate things more and that's one of the things me and the guys like about you. Don't be afraid to be you." Roy squeezed Johnny's shoulder.

"You always know what to say Roy." Johnny smiled.

"I have a stubborn partner to practise on." Roy answered.

They both looked up when they heard the phone in the house. Joanne answered it and came out to the deck. "Roy, Frank's on the phone." She told him.

"Tell him I'm busy, I'll call him back." Roy continued to sip his beer and looked over at his partner.

Johnny looked at Roy "I know Junior, and you're welcome."

"Pally." Was all Johnny needed to say.

Johnny stayed for dinner before returning home. He slept well and arrived early for shift. He was talking to Dwyer, one of the Paramedics' from C shift when Frank entered the room. He had a startled look on his face and motioned to leave but both men had seen him, so he proceeded to enter the room. His actions did not go unnoticed by Johnny.

"Frank this is Charlie Dwyer C shift Paramedic." Johnny introduced.

Frank shook his hand. "I'm thinking of trying this Paramedic gig." Announced Frank.

"Oh yeah…..new program starts in six weeks." Dwyer informed him. "Start studying now, Johnny and Roy should have all the books between them, and you should be all set." Dwyer exclaimed.

"Study, that's for kids." Scoffed Frank. Dwyer looked at Johnny a little smirk crossed his face; he knew he'd wash out first test.

Johnny shrugged his shoulders. He'd let Brackett butt heads with this guy, besides he was Roy's friend, he'd set him straight. Roy made his way into the kitchen and saw the looks exchanged between Johnny and Dwyer.

"Hey Roy! Catch you later." Dwyer left.

"Hi Junior, Frank." Roy poured himself a cup of coffee.

"Hi Pally." Johnny answered.

"What happened yesterday Roy? You blew me off." Frank glowered at his friend.

"Sorry Frank I was busy with Johnny and it went on into the night." Roy stated not noticing Frank's annoyance.

"I'm just going to check supplies Roy." Johnny left quickly giving Roy and Frank some privacy to talk.

"I didn't think you two were very close." Stated Frank.

"We've been partners for three years, feels more like ten but yeah we're close." Smiled Roy.

"Roll Call gentlemen." Cap Stanley called out.

Frank could see a change in the station's atmosphere. Everyone was making sure Johnny was okay, helping him and just generally keeping him company. Roy seemed more attentive to his partner as well. Frank dropped hints to Roy about coming over for dinner by saying how he missed the little woman's home cooked meals. Roy said he'd check with Joanne first, before asking him over. He was a little annoyed because he thought Johnny got to drop in whenever he liked. That wasn't true, Johnny was always asked to stay for a meal and it was usually after helping Roy with a project around the house.

Johnny had just put a sandwich together; he and Roy had missed lunch. He was walking over to the table and Frank discretely tripped Johnny. His sandwich ended up on the floor. "What happened?" Roy asked as he looked down at the remnants of his partner's sandwich.

"I tripped." Johnny replied as he quickly cleaned up the floor and grabbed an apple and made his way out the back.

Mike grabbed Roy and told him what really happened. "He doesn't like Johnny and Johnny knows it. That's why he didn't go to the BBQ."

Roy sighed. "Why didn't he tell me?"

"You know the answer to that Roy." Roy nodded and for the first time he was aware of a nastiness in Frank's demeanour.

On the next shift during lunch Roy asked Frank a few questions. He wanted to get a better idea of Frank as an adult. His only memories of him were as a child which could be vastly different to the adult.

"Did you and Eleana have kids?" Asked Roy.

"She has a son, claimed it was mine but he's not." Scowled Frank.

"Oh I'm sorry." Roy was embarrassed for his friend.

"Dumb broad glad to be rid of her." He got up to refill his coffee. Johnny noticed he didn't offer it to anyone except Roy. Roy frowned at Frank's statement.

Marco and Johnny exchanged glances. Johnny whispered to Marco. "I never thought I'd be glad to see Chet come back."

"Me neither." Whispered back Marco, he really didn't like Frank.

Cap shook his head at the pair.

That was Johnny's cue. "I need to finish the dorms." Johnny got up, put his plate in the sink and left.

"We need to finish the hoses Mike." Marco and Mike got up to leave.

"Talk about doing the disappearing act when it comes to kitchen duties." Complained Frank.

"Well seems to me everyone has their duties and that's exactly what they're doing. So...I suggest you get on and do yours." Cap rose and made his way to his office.

"Don't look at me I've got to finish the Latrine." Stated Roy, also rising to leave.

Frank reluctantly started to clear the table. He hated this part of the job. If there was a boot on the crew he would get him to do his chores.

Johnny finished the dorm and made his way back to the kitchen. He grabbed a Paramedic manual on the way; he wanted to go over a couple of changes. When he entered the room and sat down at the table, he noticed the table hadn't been wiped down. He grabbed a cloth and noticed the sink was still full of soapy water and dishes. Frank was nowhere to be seen. Johnny finished up the dishes and wiped down the table.

He was sitting down going through the manual and sipping coffee when Roy walked in, with Frank following close by. "Geez Gage you could have at least helped by wiping up the dishes." Frank said with a touch of sarcasm.

Johnny looked up and was about to protest when Frank cut him off. "Don't worry about it. I get it. You only do your own chores around here." Frank shook his head with disgust. Johnny was dumb founded.

"I washed up and wiped down the table." Johnny pointed his hand to the table.

"Sure you did." said Frank condescendingly.

"I did, you were nowhere to be seen." Johnny argued.

Frank turned around and laughed at Johnny. "You must be used to these guys covering for you all the time." He turned back around and smirked.

Johnny immediately realised what was happening, Frank was trying to make him look bad in front of Roy. He changed tactics; he was a master at this, having covered his naivety many times in the past. "Roy, have you read through this." He pointed to a part of the manual. Roy looked it over and shook his head. "Well I think we should go through it, there are some big changes." Johnny informed his partner. He sat down next to Johnny and they discussed the manual. Frank frowned, even with Roy this station was becoming a bore.

They were called out to a warehouse fire, no victims, so everyone was manning hoses. Frank was backing up Johnny. He tapped Johnny on the back and told him he was running out of air. Johnny looked at him confused, he hadn't heard his alarm and he should have had plenty of air left.

Frank left Johnny alone. It was hard going without a backup, but Johnny had been manning hoses since he was sixteen. He enjoyed fighting the beast, besides he knew Frank would be back soon. Some time had passed and Frank hadn't come back, Johnny got worried. He turned off his hose and placed it on the floor and started to follow it out looking for anything that may have collapsed on the way.

His HT suddenly came to life, everyone was being ordered out. Johnny made his way out and walked over to Cap to let him know about Frank when suddenly Frank was yelling at him blocking his path to his Captain.

"You left me in there. I didn't know where I was or how to get out. I had to find my way out, I could have burned in there." Frank was pushing Johnny.

Captain Stanley stood between the two men, Johnny looked confused and a little shocked, Frank was beyond angry. Cap didn't know what had happened so he separated the two of them and said he would be discussing this with them back at the station.

"Yes Cap." Johnny immediately acknowledged his Cap's orders. He joined Marco and helped with the clean-up.

"I need to sit down. I thought I was going to burn in there." Said Frank, pretending he was really shook up. He wiped his face with a shaky hand. Cap looked at him bewildered. He thought this was very odd behaviour from a fireman of his experience.

"Go sit on the engine." He ordered.

In the engine was where Frank stayed, he chuckled to himself. He had got out of clean-up and thought he had probably got Gage a reprimand to boot. Yep things were looking up. Stirring up trouble was his second name. Little did he know Mike was watching him in the side vision mirror.

Everyone was tired; all they wanted was a shower. Cap had first shower. He called Johnny in to his office and asked him what happened at the fire. Johnny was exhausted but he did his best to tell Cap everything.

"So you turned off the hose and left it there to follow it out." Confirmed Cap.

"Yep, I followed it out, I was going to come back and continue once I found Frank but you called us out." Johnny reiterated.

"Ok go have your shower Johnny and thanks for all the help with clean up." Cap finished writing.

Frank was in the shower. Cap was a little annoyed. He should have waited for Johnny to have his, the squad needed to get back into service. Frank made sure he had a real hot shower.

When it was Johnny's turn the hot water ran out. Johnny had to have a cold shower. It was no fun but he was too tired to worry about it so he had it cold without complaint.

Frank told his version of the events to Cap and like all lies there were floors in his story. Cap checked a few things with his observant engineer, called headquarters and then called Frank back into his office.

After talking with Cap, Frank stormed out of the office straight to the locker room. Johnny was just finishing dressing when Frank entered. "Enjoy the cold shower Gage." He smirked

Johnny shrugged his shoulders "Didn't worry me. Had plenty of cold showers?" Johnny realised it felt good to be able to admit something and not worry about revealing too much. What did it matter to Frank if Johnny had cold showers growing up? It felt good not to hide, Roy was right.

"I've been reprimanded because of you Gage."

"How do you work that one out Frank?" Asked Johnny.

"I don't like you; everyone dotes over you, including Roy. You're a loser. I don't know what they see in you." Frank leant over and got right into Johnny's face and was about to say something else when he was interrupted.

"Leave my partner alone Frank." Roy was angry. He couldn't believe a friend of his could treat his partner so badly.

"Gladly, you're welcome to it," and with that he left.

Roy looked at his partner and tried to smile. Johnny was a little shocked by Frank's behaviour; no one in the Fire Department had been that vicious towards him.

"I guess he had a hidden self I never knew about." Roy said quietly, a little unnerved by the encounter.

"Yeah." Was all Johnny could say.

"You know, you think you know someone, but then you suddenly see them for who they really are and it's not always good."

"Yeah, it's a little bit like Billy. I thought I knew him but then he revealed his deceit to me and I realised I never really knew him." Confirmed Johnny.

"That's right Junior, I guess both our friends from growing up let us down." Roy sat down next to his partner. "How about breakfast at my place?" Roy asked.

"Joanne's cooking, you bet. I love food." He rubbed his growling stomach.

"That's something you've never hidden Johnny, your love for food."

_This is not the end; Roy's friend Frank causes our two favourite Paramedics some problems. Hope this story reads well for everyone. I tried to include all the little bits of information about John Gage's childhood that were revealed in the show. _


End file.
